It has been 3 years since Randy, my husband, received the last minute gift of a double lung transplant. Randy had been on life support for almost 2 weeks, and time was running out. His lungs had failed, but no one really knew why (after the transplant at UT Southwestern Transplant Center it was determined that Randy had Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis). The past 3 years, post transplant, have been full. Full of fear, sorrow, hope, joy, and relief. I think we have run the gamut of emotion, and it has been a true roller coaster. The last year has been much more tranquil, though, for which we are grateful. Both of our children married in 2015 and we have welcomed two new family members! Looking back, I want to reprint my post from September 10, 2013, reminding us all that Miracles do Happen!
The last 24 hours have been a whirlwind of emotion.ย Yesterday, about 11a, Dr. Builineni informed me that Randy had an offer of lungs.ย He said the offer looked very promising, and there was a 50/50 chance that Randy would be transplanted.ย He said he would keep me informed.ย Of course, my heart was racing, and I was hopeful and scared and worried and excited, and relievedโฆand probably another 100 emotions were in there as well.ย My father in law, Rex, came to visitโฆ.and again, I had to keep my mouth closed, which is not the easiest thing for me to do. Offers had come beforeโฆand not gone through, so I didnโt want to raise anyoneโs hopes on a 50/50 chance.ย My friend, Harmony, arrived and surprised me with a delicious assortment of goodies:ย vitamin water, energy mix nuts, chicken salad (I’m a vegetarian, but itโs the thought that counts and my daughter ate it), and wonderful broccoli salad.ย Best of all, she brought Luna Bars!ย So thoughtful, and very cheering. It also kept my mind off of the offerโฆI knew I wouldnโt hear any more about it for hours. I was right.
Alexandra came to work at the hospital, andย more hours went by.ย The doc came back by and said it was looking really good, he was ordering tests from the donor, he would keep me informed. At that point, the cat was out of the bag and I filled Alexandra in. I told her it would be hours and hours before we knew, probably, and not to get her hopes up too high, but to still keep praying or thinking positively about it.ย Finally, I got her to go home around 6p or so, I think.
A very long evening followed, with my pacing around the ICU, eavesdropping where I could, basically learning nothing until about 10p.ย At 10p the doctor called and told me there was a 90% chance this was a go.ย He said the match looked great.ย At that point, I started shaking.
There is always a chance that the surgeons who go to remove the organs may find something wrong with themโฆ.something the testing didnโt reveal.ย So you never really know it is a go until the surgeon (the harvesting surgeon) has seen the organs.ย At 1 a.m. they booked the Operating Room forย 6a.m., and I knew at that point we were at 99%.ย I felt blank, almost disembodied, but I managed to call Alexandra and Wes to let them know to be at the ICU at 5a. I waited until 5 a.m. to call RexโฆI really did not want him up worrying all night. Heโs one of those guys who gets up at 6 a.m.ย I grabbed a couple of hours of sleep in the โfamily roomโ ( a private room off of the ICU) and set my alarm for 430a.m.
When I went to Ranโs room at 445a.m. they were already there, doing a 3rd bath prep, and consolidating tubes and lines.ย They wanted him โon the tableโ at 6 a.m.ย I spoke with the anesthesiologist, the nurses, then one of the surgeons, Dr Wait.ย I signed a lotย of documents, and the kids arrived.ย A quick kiss and a few words to my sleeping Randy, and off he went.ย Ally, Wes and Carisa, and I headed to the 4th floor waiting roomโฆwhere we are right now.ย Waiting.
Butโฆthey did just update us that the right lung has been attached!ย Now they will remove the left and attach the new left lung. What a miracle!
You know, there are two of me, or more, maybe I have Multiple Personality Disorder, but I have a very romantic, magical, believing side of myself, letโs call her Tammyโฆ.this is the self who creates fairy dust for Christmas and the sound of reindeer and sleighsโฆ.the spiritual side that has faith that there must be somethingโฆsomething greater than ourselves….the idealistic liberal democrat who believes if everyone could just be nice to each other, weโd all be happier.ย Then, there is Tam, the logical argumentative oneย who shakes her head and says Tammy is an idiotโฆ.the one who believes in Occamโs Razor, a scientific precept:ย the simplest explanation tends to the be the correct one.ย The one who watches the news and cannot begin to understand the cruelty of the world, the one who says, โeverything that happens is just an accident of time and place, so donโt kid yourself.โย A universal spirit? A white bearded guy on a throne with angels?ย Angels on earth?ย Please.ย Get yourself a dose of reality. And yet.
And yetโฆ.sorry to sound Age of Aquariusโฆbut the stars or SOMETHING seemed to align to create the environment for Randyโs illness and healing.ย Strange, small things that made no sense at the time, but now, looking backโฆseem to lay out a pattern.ย For instance, in my college consulting business, I have a very high โcloseโ rateโฆmeaning that of the families who come to consult with me, I end up getting about 85% of them as clients. 35 percent of my business is repeat with siblings. I am pretty proud of those numbersโฆ.I had several consults with families of students for the 2015 school year, and I felt really positive about all of them.ย Out of them, I only had a couple who were still thinking about it, and the rest went with someone else. This was a first. Granted, many of these interviews/consults occurred in June when my mother was dying and I was spending most of my time with her, but I really was stunned, and felt like I must have lost my touch. Randy and I went to Cozumel for July, and I received very few inquiries during the monthโฆalso strange. On August 2nd, when Wes and I rushed Randy to the hospital, we certainly never expected anything like thisโฆ.we thought okay, infectionโฆantibiotics, steroids, home and better.ย Wes and Carisa left for Alaska.ย Randy did not get better.ย His friends began to fly in from all over the country to see him, his friends in town were in constant touch with him.ย My family flew in to be with me.
He was put on the transplant listโฆ.as number one.ย When that happened, Wes decided to return from Alaska, and shortly afterward, during his brother Russellโs visit, he experienced a severe โepisodeโ that ended up with him on life supportโฆ.because that is what ECMO and a ventilator is.ย We can say ECMO, but the truth is, Randy came very close to dying on August 30. ECMO saved his life, and he has been โunderโ ever since.ย I decided to finish my students for the 2014 college admissions year, but take on no other studentsโฆI suspended my practice, and only had to inform a couple of people who had not yet committed. For some reason, I just didnโt have solid students for the 2015 admission season.ย People have prayed for him, lit candles for him, sent energy and healing to him, visualized lungs for him, come to the hospital to pray for him, prayed during the high holidaysโฆ.surely, such collective energy and prayer must have an effect somehow?ย Is there a force in this world that is inexplicableโฆdoes fate really exist?
Nowโฆ.I know this is weird, but I carry with me, always, a Ho Tai Buddha and a Fortune Kitty.ย Both are Chinese good luck tokens.ย I have done so for years and years.ย Several months ago, Fortune Kitty disappeared.ย When Ran became ill, I brought a different Chinese cat to his room, but he continued to worsen. With offers for lungs that didnโt go through, I was becoming less hopeful, yet still promoting a positive attitude.ย Yesterday morning, when I went to wash my face, I found Fortune Kitty sitting on the counter by my sink.ย I was so excited, and I thought, today is the day!ย The real Fortune Kitty is a sign.ย I took it to the hospital, and taped it on the door where it looked over him.ย Two hours later I was told he might have organs.
So, Tammy is in the ascendant, with a sense of wonder at how the โstars alignedโ, or perhaps the music of the spheres stirred and were heard? The universe heard our wishes, God answered our prayers?ย I think it may be.ย It really may be.
I know we have a long way to go, a hard road of recovery, but how many people get a second chance at life?ย I believe a miracle happened for Randy and I, our children, family and friends.ย A large collective has been united in a causeโฆ.and it has made a difference.
Bless every one of you.ย We wait with hope and anticipation that Randy will recover.
Mithra Ballesteros
Indeed, life is good! I appreciated your story and have decided everyone in my family needs a Fortune Kitty.
Tam Warner
Oh yes, the Fortune Kitty is a must!
Cathy Sikorski
I love that you’re continuing to share this. I’m certain like your Good Luck Kitty, someone out there is waiting to hear this message. So happy all your family is doing well!
Cathy Sikorski recently posted…A-rears or Ass-inine?
Tam Warner
Thank you! We did receive a miracle!
Kim Tackett
So thrilled for all of you. Randy looks great, and so do you!
Tam Warner
Thanks!
Debbra Dunning Brouillette
So happy for you and your husband! What a blessing! Here’s to his continued health! (I would imagine he could snorkel but wonder if he is now barred from scuba diving due to the lung transplants?)
Debbra Dunning Brouillette recently posted…Hyatt Ziva Cancun resort featured on JohnnyJet.com
Tam
No diving. Sigh. But snorkeling is good!!
Debbra Dunning Brouillette
That’s something, at least!
Tam Warner
Yes. We have discussed it many times…and always we come back to, why take the chance? He cannot go to remote locations with me because he needs to be within a couple of hours of a transplant center. We go to Cozumel, but although it is not remote, the health care is not good enough for him.
Juetta West
I raise my drinkie poo to you, Randy and family for keeping the faith, love and drive to keep on keeping on. What a celebration—celebrating a miracle that all of you saw right before your eyes. May peace, love, happiness and great health always be with you Tam and family.
Smoochie,
Juetta
Tam
Smoochie back to you, dear friend and twin!
Susan Schweikert
Wow three years!!! So glad this last year has been less of a roller coaster ride for you all!!
Tam
I can hardly believe it’s been 3 years! It seems like yesterday.
Helene Cohen Bludman
What a blessing and a gift! Modern medicine is quite amazing.
Tam
It truly is.
Elnora Cameron
Tam, this is a beautiful and very emotional story. Until now, I did not know the details. The interesting and engaging way you write puts me right in the hospital with you and your family and your friends. I’m thankful Randy has made it through 3 years post-op and hope this trajectory of recovery continues. All the best.
Tam Warner
Thank you, Elnora! I know it will!
Lois Alter Mark
I love reading about you – and Tammy ๐ So happy to hear good news about Randy, and hope he keeps getting better and better. It may be time to invest in Fortune Kitties!
Tam Warner
Fortune Kitties are very, very lucky! I never travel without one!
Leanne
What a fantastic story Tam – and such a great outcome. You are blessed indeed to have had everything fall into place at the right time, but I bet there was also a lot of hard work to get where you are today. It certainly makes me appreciate my health and my husband’s health, but also how easily all that can change. So happy for your happily ever after (and that he got to be part of those two weddings!) x
Tam Warner
It can change in a microsecond. It always happens to other people, I thought. But no, it can happen to you, too! Hope you and yours don’t have anything like this…ever!
barbara free
I can’t believe it’s been 3 years. I am so grateful and happy that your entire family has grown together, including Randy. Give him a big hug from me ! So glad he continues to do well. Love modern medicine, and the thoughtful folks who are willing to donate organs.
tam Warner Minton
I can’t believe it is 3 years, either. We are so lucky!