Travels with Tam

So Much to be Thankful for!

February 15, 2014 By Tam Warner 7 Comments

It is Valentine’s Day, and Randy and I spent it at UT Southwestern, as the lung transplant team decided yesterday they wanted to do a bronchoscopy (a look at the lungs, outpatient surgery). For those who don’t know, my spouse, Randy, had a double lung transplant in September. He was there for months. Ah, the comfortable seats of hospital waiting rooms! I had forgotten the very special pain they give. As I sat, waiting to hear from the doctor, I read a story in the Dallas Morning News that talked about a young family, a couple with four young children, ages 1-7. The young man, 36 years old, has been diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimers. The story tore at my heart…what a terrible, terrible thing to happen to such a young man, and to his wife and young children. She is taking care of four children, and her husband, who cannot dress, hold a child, or do much of anything, really. It reminded me to count my blessings.

Raised by wonderful parents and a peerless brother. — Raised by wonderful parents and a lifetime with my peerless brother.

There are too many to count. Certainly among them is Randy’s life, two wonderful children (young adults), a family who loves me, extended family who mean the world to me, good friends who care, and a life that has been full of love. There have been challenges, but I have always known I was loved. My life is, and has been, full of blessings, and I am thankful for every single one of them.

And here is one more: Randy’s bronchoscopy came back perfect, no problems! A celebration of 5 months post transplant. Each milestone is a reason to be happy. Speaking of which, I hope your Valentine’s Day was wonderful!

After 50 a new life begins, so Turn It On!

February 12, 2014 By Tam Warner 10 Comments

I am part of some wonderful online groups for women over 50, and I can tell you they are all terrific. After 50, we all agree, there is time to be creative, to build a new business, to start a new life! We are finished raising our children, and freedom opens the landscape. These women are busy writing, cooking, creating, starting businesses….it is so inspiring!

Let me take a case in point. A friend of mine from junior high school/high school has recently started a clothing line that combines fitness, fashion and function! She loves fashion, and loves working out, and these two passions came together to form Turn It On Designer Crossover Fitness Wear. It is a great concept! You can go to work, lunch, anywhere you want to, and then transition to your workout, whatever it is, without skipping a beat. Their idea:

Turn It On™ introduces the first truly fashionable line of designer fitness wear. Turn It On styles reflect the fashion runway yet allow you to crossover from fitness wear to ‘every wear’ effortlessly. Turn It On styles are versatile bringing fashion from the studio to the street. Whether it is lunch with the girls, a dinner date, or an after 5 office party, Turn It On fitness fashion makes looking and feeling fabulous as simple as adding accessories, heels, and jewelry to our styles…simply, elegantly, and fashionably. It’s about time luxury has entered the fitness wear market.

I really like the clothes! I’ve already been purchasing, and plan to continue to do so. The fabric is amazing. Now, I am no fashionista, but I do work out, and most fitness clothing I find to be lacking. Too tight, too loose, doesn’t breathe….you know the drill. These clothes have a totally different feel. They use a 4 way stretch fabric, you can read about it here. I don’t know anything about fabrics, but this feels great! These clothes are definitely for the fashionable, on-the-go, fitness loving woman. Who knows, I might even turn into a fashionista. Maybe they’ll make a wetsuit line for my dive trips!

I want to congratulate my old friend, Juetta West, and wish her the very best for her new venture! We are still going strong, Juetta!

I think my dog is psychotic.

February 10, 2014 By Tam Warner 8 Comments

No, seriously! She is a complete whack. She is cute as a button, just precious. But psycho.

We adopted Lucy from a rescue organization for Golden Retrievers. She joined Luke, our other rescue golden. He’s hyper, but friendly and sweet, so she didn’t get psycho from him. Actually, I knew she had a problem when friends dropped by to see her shortly after we picked her up and she was scared to death of them. Lucy actually peed on me she was so nervous. RED FLAG.

But she was so cute. We took her to a trainer, and worked with her. How nervous is this dog? She left wet paw prints on the sidewalk. Now that is anxious. So we worked with her, and got her to the point where she didn’t run away from everyone, and we were allowed to keep her. It was close…they were questioning the wisdom of letting a dog with her temperament be adopted. I later found out that the entire litter (only 4 of them) were on the nervous side. The pups were dumped and separated too early, I think. So we have our Lucy.

Lucy believes that everything in the house belongs to her. All of the dog toys belong to her. She will growl and even attack Luke for coming near her when she has a toy. She will strut around him, showing off a bone or bully ring, then growl if he shows interest. I buy them each a toy, but Lucy always wants the one Luke gets. So Luke takes the other one, then she wants it back. I have seen her gather toys into a pile and sit and guard them from Luke and from our “granddogs”, snarling a warning. If I pet Luke or one of the granddogs she tries to get between us. She wants ALL of the attention. She also loves to bring you things: your underwear, your socks, your shoes. At least she doesn’t chew the stuff up anymore. I lost a lot of Toms and Crocs and undies the first year we had her. Now she picks it up and trots around with it, acting coy when you take it from her. Crazy girl.

She barks like a maniac. A high pitched, fearful bark. It is offensive to her to be outdoors without her human(s) for any length of time. All of the dogs like to be in the house best, but Lucy is ridiculous about it. She barks at the yard guys (who are here every week.) She barks at the pool guy (who comes twice a week for longer than we’ve had her, but she still barks at him). Take a walk. A mailbox? A trash can? Scary. We took her on a trip…the boat scared her! The doorbell rings? Batten down the hatches because she goes nuts barking. Someone is walking their dog on OUR street? How dare they? Bark bark bark. I always introduce people to Lucy and Luke at the front door with treats. The guest gives each dog a treat, then they are fine. They run off with the treat, then come back to check the person out. Lucy is mostly afraid of everyone, of course. Yes, I tried doggy day care. 3 times. She was kicked out each time. She has to be leashed in a dog park because she is so fearful of the other dogs. I also had to remove her from obedience training. Fear, fear, fear. Bark bark bark. Grr, grr, grr.

Lucy loves her thunder jacket, you know, the swaddle jackets they put on dogs so they aren’t afraid of storms or being in the car? She loves wearing it, and she is better when it is on, but she can’t have it on all the time or she gets used to it and it makes no difference. We have tried anti-depressants (yes, seriously, the vet suggested it)…they do nothing. Try to calm her with a natural sedative like peppermint or lavender? Nope. Does not work. I need to get a trainer out to observe her growling at the other dogs. She is so jealous when Luke plays with the other dog, but I don’t think the snarling and growling routine is working. She is socially awkward! Cesar Milan, Dog whisperer, where are you???

Get Out of the Cold!

February 7, 2014 By Tam Warner Leave a Comment

Baby, it is COLD outside! Check out the great travel deals on this post and fly away! Here are some great hotel deals as well…20% off seems like a good deal to me. I’m headed out of the cold in 3 weeks, and it can’t come soon enough!

Updates on Randy and Year of the Horse

February 6, 2014 By Tam Warner 2 Comments

Someone told me the other day that this is the year of the Wooden Horse (Chinese Astrology). I was also advised that the previous two years were “water” years, 2012 was the Water Dragon, followed by 2013’s year of the Water Snake. Apparently, the past two years have been low on energy and kind of sad. I can certainly relate to that. But the year of the Wooden Horse is supposed to bring better times. According to Susan Levitt, “The Wood Horse year is a time of fast victories, unexpected adventure, and surprising romance. It is an excellent year for travel, and the more far away and off the beaten path the better. Energy is high and production is rewarded. Decisive action, not procrastination, brings victory. But you have to act fast in a Horse year. If you are not 100% secure about a decision, then don’t do it. Events move so quickly in a Horse year that you don’t want to gallop off in the wrong direction.” Ok. I’m ready. I have an adventure coming up the end of February…off to Thailand and Myanmar for diving. I am so looking forward to it. CLICK TO TWEET.

Randy is recovering from his double lung transplant very well, but his father is experiencing health issues, and that is holding back some of his recovery, I believe. We are in the process of trying to get some home health care involved, meals delivered, and someone to help Ran’s dad a few times a week with tasks he wants done. Hopefully that will free Randy up a bit to get back to PT full time and other recovery tasks. I hope so. With lung transplant, there is ONE window, 6 months to a year, to get your lungs to their absolute best. After the one year mark, they begin to age. It is critical that Randy work as hard as he can to get as much lung volume as possible.

Midlife and the empty nest offer great opportunities, but there is also the other side of midlife: our illnesses, parent illnesses and the loss of your parents. And your friends. So far in 2014 a friend has lost her husband suddenly, an old friend has passed away, and my biological father passed as well. My aunt fell down a flight of stairs and broke her leg and her collarbone. As in all times in our lives, midlife definitely has its set of challenges. However, the year of the horse didn’t start until Feb 1, and all of that happened in January. So I still have hope for 2014! I received a surprise invitation to see Sting on Sunday night, so that is an unexpected adventure. One thing I have always known is that you have to go while you can. As far as possible, and within reason, go and do what you want to NOW, while you are able. Truly, you only have this moment.

So…. Go Horse, Go! Run for the Roses! Make the Year of the Wooden Horse, 2014, a great year! Oh, and Happy New Year to you!

A New Journey

February 3, 2014 By Tam Warner 2 Comments

I have done yoga for a long time. That doesn’t mean I do it well. Yoga has kept me moving through so many physical issues….my back surgery ( I did yoga instead of PT ), joint pain, injuries, MRSA and the misery of trying to move again after 3 months in bed and several skin grafts and LOTS of morphine….it helps with my scuba diving by giving me good breath control, so I can happily stay in my weightless environment longer. I have long studied the eight limbs of yoga, and I’ve tried to meditate, though I’m not very good at that either. I try to make myself relax and stay in my bubbly bathtub for 20 minutes…I usually make it about 5. When I try to quietly meditate and concentrate on my breath, I last an even shorter period of time. Relax? Tough one for me. And no, I cannot just lay on a beach or lounge chair. I go crazy. Sometimes diving, or listening to music is a kind of meditation for me.

So, a new journey begins. Advanced Yoga Studies. AYS covers everything in greater depth, from the asanas (postures) to the physical body (anatomy, basically), and the philosophy. It is every weekend for a month, 5 hours a day. That amount of time is a serious challenge for my 4 rods and 8 pedicle screws which are inserted in my lumbar spine. I made myself a happy place today with bolsters and pillows and blankets so I can get into sitting positions in comfort. Yesterday…well, I spent last night flat on my back. Ouch.

So why am I doing this? Lots of reasons really. First, I have always wanted to go deeper into the philosophy. Second, I thought I might be able to find ways to do postures so I do not hurt. Third, life has been kind of unusually challenging for the last few years….and the last 6 months have been more than challenging. How to describe it? When you are at the point when you don’t dare ask what else could possibly go wrong? I never ask what else could happen, I don’t want to tempt fate. I try to keep my mouth shut so fate will not notice me. Fourth, after a lifetime of putting others first, being daughter, mother, spouse, sister…I want to get to know myself, and what I want, and what I do or don’t believe in. There are two of me: the logical scientist who wants empirical proofs about any and all things, and the other me who wants to just believe. The logical side likes to interfere in that process. I have always had a magical way of looking at things, and in the last couple of years that viewpoint has dimmed. Yes, I still feel childlike wonder in nature, which drives me to spend as much time in it as possible (particularly the water, as I’m sure everyone knows), but I have trouble accessing it in my everyday life anymore. Why? I don’t know. Maybe because my children have grown up? Having children was wonderful and magical (yes the logical side has plenty to say about that)….I read to them and told them stories of fantastic feats and daring deeds, tried to build their characters with a code of ethics, I sang to them, recited poetry to them to get them to sleep at night, played with them, and their friends, and I have missed them now that they are all grown up. I miss the funny, and sometimes insightful, things they would say, the smell of Johnson & Johnson shampoo, and the uninhibited way they shared their feelings and thoughts as well as their hugs. My 23 year old son is engaged to be married! That carries a bit of a punch to the stomach…it truly lets me know how much time has passed. The time was rich and full…but that time in our lives has passed. I have looked forward to the empty nest and to being alone with my husband, Randy…like we were before we had children. Again though, the wheel of fortune has turned and Randy has suffered a devastating illness followed by the miracle of a double lung transplant. Life has changed though, and adjustments are necessary. As his illness progressed, and as he works to recover, there is a realization that some things will never be the way they were, so we have to learn to want another way of doing and being. Click to Tweet.

Anyway, my point is, some of my idealistic optimism has tarnished. I want it back. It may not be as bright and shiny as it was, but it is an essential part of me that I need to reconnect with. SO. Advanced Yoga Studies, a journey that begins to go inward. I like to explore, to learn, to research, to synthesize knowledge…now the object of study is me. I am open to discovery, and hopefully the rediscovery of things which have gone deep within.

My daughter asked me tonight why I like to travel so much. It is the experience of other places, other worlds (such as the underwater realm or the savannah), other cultures, other ways of seeing…which gives me new perspective, excitement, and often, a feeling of deep gratitude for what I have been given. Each trip gives me a deeper sense of attachment to, well, to everything and everyone. I marvel at the richness of our earth and all of its inhabitants. I want to help protect it, and them. Travel piques curiosity, and I think curiosity, coupled with wonder at each new discovery, is what creates purpose and worth in our lives. Sometimes you don’t even need to walk out the door to take a journey. “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt. “The purpose of life is a life of purpose.” ― Robert Bryne. So am I living my purpose? Am I being true to myself? The path of yoga may be a way to appreciate those questions, and perhaps, to find answers. Or maybe the answer is more questions.

“Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home” says the poet Matsuo Basho. I believe that to be true. Wherever I am, in my own heart I am home. So I will continue the path, and share with you what I find. As we say in yoga class, Namaste.

RESTART! REVITALIZE! REVAMP!

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